Anytime I need anything I turn to Craigslist.  An awesome site where you can find pretty much anything from an apartment to a job.  Hell, you can even find dates and hookers!  Today I clicked on the “missed connections” link and was amazingly shocked at what I found.  This section is a combination of sad and awesome.  Sad because it is about all those little moments between two people that never develop.  What could have happened if maybe one person said something?  Maybe it could have lead to something great.  Even though this whole section can be a little depressing, I also find it a bit poetic and romantic.  Here are a couple of the posts I enjoyed:

*

Me – Monochrome. All black, skin-tight jeans and t-shirt. Long, straight black hair and pale skin. Dark, dark eyes like oil.
You – Medium build, regular height, Caucasian, brown eyes, brown hair. You were wearing jeans and a black pea coat.
I caught a glimpse of your big brown eyes. You looked like you could use me.

Stop being so damn cute.
with your glasses,
mouth habit
and blue jean jacket.
Hey, I know nothing will/can ever come out of this,
But I’ve noticed the way you look at me…
Stare at me for a reaction…
You should stop that - people notice.
I secretly have the hots for you - and you won’t ever know

In every glance there you were, smirking something fierce. You must know I’m crushing.
I don’t really know who you are, but I want to hold the glimmer from your eyes in my day dreams in hopes that they can float off into forever, secretly embraced and openly reveled in.
You’re going to be my unspoiled joy for as long as I can have you.
Thanks, cute stuff!

This weird unspoken situation between us has been carrying on for some time now.
It has been weeks since the last time I saw you and I still can’t get you out of my head.
I think about you every day and I’m not even sure if you know my name.
I’m lame and you probably think you’re too old for me or something.
I still think you’re awesome and I hope we meet someday under different circumstances.
I want to make you feel amazing.

Every once in a while a man finds a way to break new ground. Breaking the sound barrier. Walking on the moon. Splitting the atom. I feel that we may have another example of this feat. A man in Houston is trying to accomplish what would have seemed impossible only a few years back. Via Craigslist, he wants to find a male masturbation partner to service him while he is tied to a tree in the middle of a tornado. Yes, he wants his ejaculation to enter the funnel.

This man…wait. Man is not strong enough of a word. This pioneer is breaking new ground. He is actually proposing to not only involve another male into his sexual endeavor. He wants to also involve a tree and an element, the wind. This guy is like…well…there isn’t a word for this. That means I get to create one! Here it is. Homo-splinterdik-windcumiac.

For this trail blazer of sexual freedom, the internet age has truly accelerated his chances of making this a reality. Imagine him 20 years ago trying to find someone at the bar who would be into that? The odds are astronomical. But, being able to post on the internet has lowered his odds to…well…still extremely high….but much more likely!

Click on the pic below to see the actual ad: